#BDSM ~ Vintage Style

You gotta wonder what went thru the minds of the people that came up with the following advertisements – or how the public perceived what they saw/read because, when I came across one of these, I had to dig for more – too funny!

Aint nothing like an ad (or two ~ or three) for a spanking! I mean, seriously – that woman should know better and, if she (or he..?) forgot – remind her who’s boss!

all ads

For those of you that are into or have a ads9lactation fetish … heck, why not a little breast torture – erm: enhancement?


Then there’s keeping a girl at your feet








Oh, look! We have color!!
ads5And there she is; admiring the shoes that are well shined … not quite boot-black material, but it’s a start!
Doesn’t she look happy there on the floor, admiring his footwear?
*heavy sigh of contentment*.





Such a good girl, serving himads4 breakfast in bed (while he’s fully clothed) because we all know, they put that tie on and the games can begin at any moment!
Ties ~ they can do splendid things.






Gotta adore advertisements that only try to help a gal protect herself and what better way than through a depiction of bondage?





Who doesn’t love the stingy feel of a tensads8 unit or the tight comfort of a corset .. better yet, let’s combine them with the lost art of electrostimulation through a corset!






But, my friends, I don’t want you to despair and hold onto your dismayed belief that we have forsaken our need to advertise about BDSM because we haven’t!
I leave you with the renewed efforts of today’s advertisement!

not vintage

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I #AmWriting #Excerpt

Because of so many other commitments, I haven’t been able to write and my Viking trilogy has been sitting on the shelf but I have two weeks of no commitments and am taking advantage of writing and I have to say, I forgot how fun it was!

For me, it’s like playing the starring role in a movie as I live (in my head) out a fantasy. I see, I’ve already given you a peek at my 1st book in the trilogy called Viking’s Reward so I’m going to give you a peek at Viking’s Captive. Since the last excerpt covered the erotic side of the book, I wanted to give you a taste of the side where a character has a phobia where the heroine has been taken …. well … captive. Rissa has a phobia of  all things creepy crawly and here’s an excerpt of her reaction when she sees …. oh heck, I’ll let you read it but I need to forewarn you that her captive has an accent (being that he’s a Viking and all) and pronounces her name wrong so it isn’t a spelling error ~ Enjoy!

Since the last excerpt covered the erotic side of the book, I wanted to give you a taste of the side where a character has a phobia so I take you to the part where the heroine has been taken …. well … captive. Rissa has a phobia of  all things creepy crawly and here’s an excerpt of her reaction when she sees …. oh heck, I’ll let you read it but I need to forewarn you that her captor has an accent (being that he’s a Viking and all) and pronounces her name wrong so it isn’t a spelling error ~ Enjoy!

They’d been traveling so long that Rissa’s thighs hurt every time she went up the smallest incline or had to step over a rock because she didn’t have the energy to stumble around it. Her stomach stopped talking over an hour ago, the pieces of jerky handed to her from Red were not enough to fill the emptiness caused by the non-stop walking over uneven terrain.

Exhausted, Rissa feared lifting her eyes from the ground and possibly missing anything that would make her fall. If she fell, there would be no getting back up so she could only spare quick peeks to see if there was something ahead to indicate they would be stopping sometime soon.
This time, she glanced up and something out of her peripheral vision caused her to jerk her head over to see a huge spider hanging from a tree just off to the right. Her heartbeat instantly skyrocketed and her eyes widened in terror even as a portion of her brain told her the creature wouldn’t have touched her if she kept going but a bigger portion of her brain instantly believed that the damn spider was huge and was close enough to jump on her and that was enough to make Rissa squealed and jump back.
A hand clamped over her mouth, effectively cutting off her shriek, and an arm around her waist kept her still.
Eyes wide, she kept trying to see where the damn spider had gone while struggling furiously against the steel bands. She needed to know if it was still just hanging there or if it was now on one of them and, if it was on the man holding her, would it crawl onto her?
Fangs, spindly legs with claws – every horrible conclusion intensified her terror and adrenaline filled her veins and she fought for her life.
It could be poisonous and neither Red nor Blondie had tried to save her.
Wrestled to the ground, Rissa fought harder. The damn spider could be crawling on the ground now.
The harsh whisper of her name in her ear finally filtered through and she glanced up at the man holding her.
Taking another frenzied look around, she looked back at him and tried to still her quivering body.
When he removed his hand, she gasped weakly, hating the tear that slipped down her cheek as she tried to look over his shoulder, while gripping his shirt. “Spider.”

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Posted in Books, Excerpt Tagged , ,

I Don’t Owe You My Aftercare

Don’t you just love when you think you have a pretty good grasp on the ins and outs of the common day situations and then BAM, something makes you think outside of the box you tried never to get into in the first place??
I actually love when that happens … especially when it comes from a source I’da never thought of so you know what I do when that happens: I ask to share it!
Here’s Ode2Joy’s thoughts on aftercare

When I was first starting out on my own yellow brick rope road, I volunteered to run through a demo negotiation.

One of the questions I asked in our “negotiation” was something about aftercare. I was surprised by his response, which was that he didn’t “do aftercare.” I thought aftercare was a required thing by everyone, it was a major learning lesson for me that hey! not everyone is the same and has the same needs.

I like to think that I ask a question about aftercare in all my negotiations, but I know I definitely don’t. Sometimes I forget. Sometimes it just doesn’t come up. Sometimes it’s because I’m playing with people I don’t feel like I have to negotiate or renegotiate with. But I’ve run into a few problems with not talking about it:

1) My aftercare is not always my top’s aftercare. Knowing the definition of what aftercare actually means to all parties is important. Recently, I was about to tie with a new partner and, in our negotiations, he asked me what kind of aftercare I preferred. It varies from person to person, but something that doesn’t change is that I definitely want to coil my rigger’s ropes if I can and sit and chat with them while I do it. Being able to tell him that, specifically, made our aftercare smoother, especially because I then asked him what his aftercare looked like. This included more touch than I usually need. But him knowing what I needed and me knowing what he needed meant that in the end, we both got what we needed.

2) There are times when I don’t actually want aftercare. Gasp! Usually, this is when I’m tying with either newer people or people I don’t have much of an emotional connection with. I don’t want to sit and cuddle with someone I don’t feel close with. Additionally, if the scene isn’t that intense or difficult, I’m usually up and ready to go right after being untied. That’s one of the reasons I like to coil my rigger’s ropes, because it forces me to sit and talk and allow myself space between scenes, as well as hopefully making sure my rigger doesn’t feel like a carnival ride, which is a feeling I never want to cause.

3) Aftercare for me often feels more intimate than the scene itself. There have been times, especially when I don’t talk about aftercare beforehand, that I feel like I have to lie there and cuddle with someone, because that’s what they maybe assume I want, or that’s what they want, and they haven’t asked what I want. No one should assume anything.

Basically, long story short, I don’t owe you my aftercare. But I encourage you to talk about it, I just don’t owe it to you.

For the unedited version, please check out Ode2Joy’s post on Fetlife (must be a member to view.)

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Posted in BDSM

#BDSM Conversations ~ #YerDoinItWrong

Ahhh, the joys of sharing those things which make me chuckle. Here’s another installment of adventures of on-line chatting. After all; sharing is caring! Beware; I’m keeping the spelling as it was sent … I’m nice like that

Him: Hi im a dom who lives in XYZ im looking for a sub to plat with if you are compatible i would like to hear from you

Time for me to use my typonese skills … so, he’s a player that can’t type well and a sure sign of someone wanting to get laid (the whole ‘dom’ vs ‘Dom’ thing) … but maybe I’m jaded and need to take the time to understand.

Me: LOL ~ and how do I know if I’m compatible?

Him: Read my profile sweetie

Awww – he called me ‘sweetie’ – my heart melts … not really – more like my eyes roll because I’m really sure he just wants to get laid – but still, why do they always want me to read their profile and yet they can’t seem to read mine? If they had, they wouldn’t have ever started a conversation with me … but, okay, I’ll give it a go…

Me: hmmm. The fact that you’re married and you live for: SCA,  Hair Pulling, Humiliation, Leashes, Objectification, Orgasm Control and Love:
Amusement Parks, Gambling, Movies and  Gags doesnt really tell me squat Smilie: ;)

Him: Well your on a need to know bases and right now you don’t need to know lol.

Wait a minute, didn’t you JUST tell me to read it so that I would know if we were compatible?!?

Me: Then you probably shouldn’t tell me to read your profile

Him: Well at lest you listen and do what your told that’s more than half of these girls on here

Bet it took him a while to figure out a way to explain that fact away – simply ignore it. More like they aren’t submissives to asshats that play at BDSM. But maybe I’m jumping the gun and I really need to make an effort to be more understanding.

Me: Yes – the problems you are having with females arent too much different than the problems us girls have with the males

Him: I know what I want I just can’t find it these chick’s on here are fake thay all want sugar daddy’s if I wanted a prostitute I would go on backpage right.im just looking to have some bdsm fun.

The term “chicks” is a sure sign this guy is only looking to get laid – I TOLD YOU!
I have no idea with ‘backpage’ is but am assuming it’s a place for john’s to pay to get laid and he can’t afford it. The fact that he mentions “some bdsm fun” is another sign of needing to get laid but I’m trying to be understaaaaaaaandiiiiing … so let me try to be helpful

Me: Have you tried going to munches/sloshes or play parties?
There also might be classes for you to add to your knowledge as well as meet others with similar interests?

Him: Ha ha gutter slut have a chillie dog and give a bumpkin

See?? This is what I get for trying to be understanding – overrated and so not fun! I am so not going to do that again – if I play with the trolls, I must have fun with the trolls!


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Posted in BDSM, Random Notes

#BDSM Terminology

This was by far the hardest topic for me because just about every one of them has varying meanings but I’m going to give it a try with the disclaimer that the following are – in no way, shape, or form – perfect or exact in nature.
Every relationship can change the meaning to suit them and goes hand in hand with my post on labels

Dominant / Domme: male / female version of someone who controls a submissive

Switch: Male or female that enjoys both sides of the fence

Submissive: Male or female who is controlled by the dominant but does not give up full control (has some say in matters that were previously agreed on OR they do not give up control 24/7

Master / Mistress: Male / female dominant with full control over their slave – title is given to them by the community/earned.

Slave: Gives up full control and only has the rights given to them by their owner.

Kajira / kajirus: Female/male … Those who are a slave in the Gorean sense – a philosophy by the author of the Gor books, John Norman, where the Master/slave is more of a sexual relation (this can, like all dynamics, vary).

Top / Bottom: They negotiate a scene, play together for a scene, and then go their separate ways.

Sadist / Masochist / Sadomasochist: Gives pain/ takes pain /enjoys both.

Kinkster: Someone that enjoys things that aren’t considered “in the norm” – usually involving sexual activities but can be anything that is different than ‘vanilla’.

Fetishist: Someone who has a huge obsession with something that turns them on sexually (feet, nylons, kilts).

Exhibitionist / Voyeur: Enjoys being watched/enjoys watching.

Sensualist: Are not into pain – rather more of a sensual/sexual aspects of BDSM.

Princess: A female that is spoiled – just not a spoiled brat.

Slut: Enjoys being used sexually – not just by their owner.

Doll: Is placed in dresses and makeup which resemble a doll-like appearance and exhibits those behaviors as well.

Sissy: A male that is made to dress and behave as a female which is normally in the extreme.

Rigger: A person (male or female) that enjoys bondage/suspension – mainly with rope.

Rope top: Someone who ties up another, normally with rope – can be very complicated and/or beautiful.

Rope bottom / Rope bunny:  Someone tied up, usually with rope while a ‘bunny’ is someone who models the final product.

Spanko:  Enjoys spanking or being spanked to the point of a fetish.

Spanker: someone who spanks another.

spankee: someone who enjoys being spanked by others.

Leather Family: A group of people of various definitions (daddy, dom, sub, bottom, etc) that define themselves as a family unit.

Bootblack: Someone that shines and takes care of boots. Can include other leather goods.

Primal / Primal predator / prey: can be the type of play or the behavior used in play.

Bull: Can be construed as a male that has sex or services the female when she is in a different relationship.

Cuckold / cuckqueen: The husband or wife that enjoys infidelity from their spouse. Might watch their spouse engaged in sex with someone.

Age player / Daddy / Mommy / Big / little / baby girl /boy: Enjoys being a person of a juvenile age and being treated as such. Some enjoy the incestuous aspects of such a relationship while others who identify as such are greatly disturbed by this type of behavior.

Brat: Can understand where the line is and cross it anyway. They might consider themselves as someone who keeps another on their toes.

Pet / kitten / pony / pup: Identifies as such and enjoys being treated as the animal they chose. The difference between this and furry is that they do not identify as an animal on a 24/7 basis.

With the understanding that I tried to keep this simple, let me know what you think or would love to add to this list or to the definitions.

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